The Era of Proto-Social Media: Fugazi Dating Site Typology
Top 10 Types of "Hot" Women on Tinder List...
There are a lot of dating sites online and most don't acquire much traction, but some are propelled to the forefront and demand recognition and legitimization through millions of people using them. LavaLife, PlentyOfFish and Tinder have all come up in regular conversations in my city of Toronto and you aren't "weird", "desperate" or "creepy" to have created a profile on those sites. Questions abound: Do you use the site? Have you dated off of it? Was it a good match? Undoubtedly, there are real women on dating sites and there are legitimate profiles and some of those belong to very physically attractive women, well-bred with decent education and careers. However, there are also types on dating sites because using a dating site is a desperate moment in life and common circumstances form the conditions for those desperate moments to be indulged. Using dating sites to meet mates occurs when real life encounters have either failed or for whatever reason anxiety has built up creating an anti-social reaction to real life encounters. For now, let's not consider niche dating sites that focus on commonality of religion, ethnicity or youth culture. This list will focus on the biggest dating sites that have the most users and the broadest cross-section of people - a site like Tinder. These sites attract types, but they also attract types of "hot" women, in particular. Let's just consider "hot" to signify any combination of pretty, cute, sexy and gorgeous. However, in using these big dating sites guys may start to notice that the response from hot women and communication with hot women doesn't work exactly the way one would expect. Perhaps, these guys need to become familiar with the types of hot women on big dating sites. A lot of those profiles are disingenuous to the spirit of a dating site. There are guys who become frustrated because from real life experience they know that they are attractive, intelligent, funny and successful and can attract "hot" women, but they get no traction on big dating sites. They can't understand or appreciate why this is the case. So, I will list the top ten types of hot women on big dating sites and unveil the mystery. The order in this list is not important.
10. Khalifa Chasers
Khalifa Chaser is the term I use as a substitute for the traditional, "gold digger" and it likely is a nuanced substitute specific to Toronto, the city where I am from. A large portion of hot women on big dating sites are only interested in finding a man who is rich. This may be for the purposes of finding a husband or it might just be about getting wined and dined painting the town drab... sorry, I meant red. These women do not care about the man's appearance, ethnicity, level of fitness, sociability, etc... it only matters that he is a millionaire. If your profile does not make it completely obvious that you are filthy rich then do not expect a reply from this type.
9. STI Barfly
STI Barfly is my term to describe women who focus their time on nightlife in big cities but who get burned in a big way. They get texts from the big club promoters and follow them on Twitter. They spend more nights of the week at clubs and raves than at home. They get worn out very fast and look like hell in their late twenties. Until then, they may still be considered hot. However, these foolish women don't know better than to be seduced by sleazeballs and they end up catching a sexually transmitted infection or worse. They aren't malicious like the men who recklessly exposed them, so they become apprehensive about who they mate with, but their personalities are simple enough that they will still go after mates. There is informal code for men and women with STIs to identify themselves and these kinds of nuanced communications can be achieved through dating websites. The hot women who won't respond to you might be doing you a big favour because she can tell you don't get it... and you don't have it... and you don't want it. No one is going to volunteer that they are diseased, so the man looking to get a response from what he considers to be a good match on paper... just gets snubbed without a real understanding of why.
8. Cam Whores
Cam Whores is a crude term but an apt descriptor of the type. There are many hot women on big dating sites that are actually prostitutes or at least webcam prostitutes. They put up profiles on dating sites to flush out a certain type of male - one who is familiar with their act, has dropped money on it before, won't report them to site admins and will likely return for more services in the future. If you are not a guy who is familiar with webcam services then these women will know it right off the bat. There is a crudeness and bluntness to men who frequent prostitutes... those men have a callousness toward women that is unmistakable because it actually has a subtle element of charm effervescing at the surface. These women will find it risky to generate contact with men who would feel slighted by the duplicity. You likely won't get a response from this type unless you talk the talk.
7. Site Admins
The people who run dating sites are scumbags and I'd stake one of my major organs that that statement is a truism. It is only one step removed from porn sites as far as I can tell and a lot of the marketing and professional relationships work the same way. When a dating site launches it must have revenue and revenue on a dating site comes when unattractive people pay to message attractive people. Therefore, it is imperative that a dating site present new visitors with profiles of attractive people that seem friendly, approachable, down-to-earth and cool. Most attractive people don't have those qualities in abundance and many who do will still be refrained when creating a dating profile because it is a somewhat embarrassing situation. The site admins go to work creating fake profiles of "hot-cool" people. You won't get a reply from these profiles because that is what the site owners/admins considers to be dishonest! In the meantime, the site owners can make some extra money allowing companies to put spam bots on the site. Companies that use spam bots will almost always use pictures of hot women gleaned from Flickr, Facebook, MySpace and ModelMayhem. The bots do reply, but only to advertise a service that might not even be legitimate.
6. The Fuglies
There are physically unattractive women that can't resist the temptation to experience life as a hot or cool person. The anonymity of the internet is an ideal forum for exploring the fantasy. These homely women can rip photos of hot women from the internet and construct a fake profile to learn how it feels to be desired by men sexually. They are really just hurting themselves because the trick has a terminal value that ends with a mouse click. Often, these women will provide select men with pleasant conversation and flirting. The men will be misled and then the women will either disappear or maliciously turn on the men from shame and personal humiliation. The men will likely have no idea what happened. They may search out the women online based off of information they gained from conversations. They may even find the real women because often the fuglies will steal photos and identities from women that they know in real life - a bartender, an old high school classmate, etc. The information gleaned from conversations will be a mix of real information from the fugly life and the hot woman's life, as well as, some lies from the hybrid fantasy life.
5. The Baiters
There is a double entendre in the term for this type. Baiters is a term pulled from gay porn culture, whereby gay men trick straight men into thinking that they are having straight sex (blindfold) but are not. Some people just call that rape. Oh well. Anyway, the other part of the double entendre is on the homonym, "bator" of masturbator. So let's explain the type. There are many gay men on social media sites, especially big dating sites, who use photos of hot women to create fake profiles in the hopes of seducing unsuspecting straight men into masturbating on webcams for them. The gay men will make excuses for why they aren't ready to reciprocate on the show, and hapless straight dudes will be duped into exposing themselves on a promise alone. The contact will be broken off once the gay man gets what he came for (pun intended). This is a rotten aspect of dating sites that disenfranchise and victimize straight men (something that fascist pinkoism never ever considers and certainly would never care about). For fascist pinkos, it is only considered rape if you can identify with the victim... and those sociopaths have excluded an entire population from that consideration over claims of "privilege". I digress.
4. The Closbians
The term sounds like a bad date rape joke punchline, but actually is a portmanteau lifted from Urban Dictionary, meaning a lesbian who has not committed to the lifestyle or not publicly announced their true sexuality. There are many hot women on big dating sites who for all intents and purposes know that they do not like men and are not sexually attracted to men but still create profiles as heterosexual females. The dating site is one of the final avenues to test for becoming absolutely sure about homosexuality, and sometimes it can be an informal place to scold and denigrate random males where doing so in regular life would have negative consequences. These women may even go on dates with men, but will scold them or put them down for not meeting "women's expectations". The claim will be ironic because these women have no such expectations because they have no vested interest in heteronormative couplings. This type can be quite malicious and likely the man finds himself victimized before he can do anything about it. Be frustrated with the way of the world shouldn't license people toward abusing each other, but we know that this is how human beings act all the time.
There are many hot women in this world that are taller than 5'9", which is to say that they are taller than the male average. This can be extremely limiting for these women when it comes to finding a mate, because tall men are usually perfectly satisfied with dating women of average height or even petite women. Hot, tall women often refuse to date men that are shorter than them and in the end many of these women find themselves single and looking in their mid-twenties and early thirties. A dating site is just another avenue that has to be opened for these women who have closed off so many others. Men who are 5'9" or shorter should not expect to get replies from hot, tall women and most of these women on dating sites state that very clearly in their profile. It makes one want to go back and celebrate that Sex and the City "Politically Erect" episode. The denigrating term to describe this type doesn't is only applied for the ironically short-sighted hot, tall women who frequent dating sites. I see no issues with hot, tall women that don't live hypocritically and see no reason to lump them into a type. That philosophy can be applied as an explanation for all the types on this list - they are being lumped because they are a group acting anti-socially and should be criticized for their behaviour on dating sites.
2. The Volatiles
There are hot women who have a moment of weakness with regard to their personal life. They may have just been cheated on or realized that their ex-boyfriends were huge losers. They may have tried to seduce a man and failed. They are experiencing a personal crisis and erroneously create a profile on a dating site. They may disappear immediately but keep their profile on the site. They may stick around for a night or a weekend and exchange some messages to remind themselves that they can do better. They may even go on a date or two. But, this is executed expeditiously and the profile will become abandoned. This suits site admins and owners just fine because there will be legitimately hot women will decent personalities and real profiles on their site attracting men and compelling those men to spend money to send messages and purchasable other enticements.
There are hot women who show up at dating sites and commit to a high standard. They are there to respond to only one type of man - Superman. He must be tall, fit, sociable, nice smile, great hair, cool appearance, good dresser, signs of being well-traveled, signs of a sense of style, signs of financial success, humble in his profile description but confident in his reasons for using the site... he is there to find Superwoman, if he is lucky enough. Who knows whether it is ultra fragile egos or just totally ludicrous delusions, but these hot women know they're hot and expect to find their equivalent, but their self-assessment is severely wanting in realism and honesty. They never end up meeting their ideal guy because they aren't actually super and no super man would use a dating site, at least not the one from their fantasy. This is a useless women to expect a reply from and if you do get one it will likely be a defensive scoff of disbelief that a peon could consider themselves worthy of a super. The whole thing is sickening and everyone in the equation deserves pity for being sucked into such a pathetic, superficial interaction.
So that's it. And I know what you're thinking... what about the types of men. Types of hot men on big dating sites? I could probably craft a list of the top ten but many would be the gender equivalents of the list above. There would be the closet gay and the volatile dude. There would be the hot men going after rich women. There would be the dudes with sexual diseases. There might be some cam whores and maybe even some baiters but that would be rare. There would definitely be fuglies. There may even be some "hot" men on dating sites that are unique to the male gender - like the misogynist sociopath date rapist... I'm thinking Patrick Bateman here. I believe that this list is more interesting for focusing on the disingenuous "hot" women profiles on big dating sites because at the end of the day, Western culture is set up where the men approach the women - that is the norm - and therefore money is extracted from male users on dating sites, and not female users. Females do pay into dating sites, but it is a small piece of the pie... at most 20% of total revenue. In addition, many dating sites make their services free for women to encourage them to sign up and create profiles on the site that will then attract men. So, it is what it is whether you like it or not... and it has been that way forever and a day. And here are some factoids for you (unsubstantiated figures) - millions of dollars are lost every year on "romance scams" from communications initiated on dating sites and apparently women are bigger victims than men in that regard, but perhaps this skewing is explained by the fact that the men don't admit to being "scammed" or actually consider the prostitution to be a legitimate exchange and not in fact a "romance scam" per se. Here's another factoid... women receive 17 times more messages than men on dating sites. That would confirm my statements about revenue for dating sites being generated by males. Here's a final factoid - the biggest dating site in China is predominantly fake profiles put up by escort prostitutes. Oh, what a swindle.